A cereal imposter: Is Cap’n Crunch really a captain?
By Dan Merica
Another case of stolen valor?
After over 50 years of reported service, the U.S. Navy said Wednesday that Cap’n Crunch, one of the Navy’s most recognizable captains, has no record of service with the military branch.
A number of blogs noticed this week that the jolly, cereal selling caricature who has graced the front of Cap’n Crunch boxes since 1963 was actually wearing a commander’s uniform, the rank below a captain. The U.S. Navy uses bars on a uniform’s cuff to signify the rank of the person wearing the uniform. Cap’n Crunch’s uniform has only three bars – the sign of a commander – not four bars – the sign of a captain.
Blogs like Gawker and Consumerist recognized the missing bar and labeled Cap’n Crunch a liar.
“In other words, the Cap'n is nothing but a lousy Commander,” Neetzan Zimmerman of Gawker wrote. “Our entire cereal-eating lives could be based on a lie because of one little yellow stripe,” wrote Mary Beth Quirk of Consumerist.
The U.S. Navy played along, tweeting that Cap’n Crunch “appears to wear #USNavy commander rank.”
“We take it quite seriously,” said Lt. Commander Chris Servello, spokesman for the U.S. Navy, with a laugh. “We looked into this, we looked into our rolls to see if one Captain Crunch or Cap’n Crunch ever served in the Navy. And we had no record of that, so we passed that along to NCIS to see what action needed to taken next.”
With his record and valor being challenged, the captain (can we even call him that anymore?) did what any other captain would do – took to Twitter.
“Regarding today's rumors... of course I'm a Cap'n! It's the Crunch – not the clothes – that make a man. #PaidMyDues,” @RealCapnCrunch tweeted on June 14.
“All rumors, friends – I run an entire vessel with my crew! Case closed. #OfficialCapn,” he tweeted earlier this week.
And last night, Cap’n Crunch called for his supporters to stand with him.
“All hands on deck @USNavy, @ColbertReport Nation & Crunch Nation: I shall not rest until the truthiness comes out… stand by. #CrunchJustice,” he tweeted.
His defense, however, appeared to be broadsided by the overwhelming outrage people expressed about being duped.
https://twitter.com/CubicleViews/status/347718248927748097
Cap’n Crunch’s full name is Horatio Magellan Crunch, according to his official bio with the Quaker Oats Company. Jay Ward, the creator of Rocky and Bullwinkle, Dudley Do-Right and George of the Jungle, created him in 1963.
Hailing from Crunch Island, Cap’n Crunch lives and commands the boat S.S. Guppy, according to his bio. Although Cap’n Crunch started as cereal box character, he and his nemesis Jean LaFoote starred in his own animated series, “The Mystery of Crunch Island.” According to his bio, the captain has been lost at sea since 1985.
After saying they take this case very seriously, the Navy said this may be another case of “stolen valor,” where someone wears medals or a uniform that they have not earned. The punishment for impersonating a military officer: six months in jail.
No word, yet, on why Cap’n Crunch’s eyebrows are on his captains hat.
@natlsecuritycnn on Twitter
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I to feel like i was lied to. Captain how dare you! This was a great read. Im glad to see people took time out of their day to have some fun with it.
You don't have to have a Captains rank to be a Captain of a ship. Just have to be the highest ranking officer on the ship. I was in the Navy and our Captain was a Commander just like Cap'n Crunch.
Any officer commanding any US Navy ship is referred to as Captain irregardless if he is just an ensign or a c p o the highest ranking person on that ship is referred to as Captain check your Navy regulations
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1. He is from Crunch Island, not the USA.
2. The Person in charge of the ship regardless of rank is often referred to as the Captain.
3. Not All countries us the same strip system as the US.
4. His ship is the S.S. Guppy – Not USS or USNS So again not ours.
Capt. Crunch is a foreigner whom happens to have fame in the USA. (Understandably, Crunch Island is just as real as the Capt.)
The Captain is from Crunch Island... so maybe the reason he's not listed in the US Navy's rolls is because he's not part of the US Navy. I know this will come as a shock, but the US isn't the only country to have a Navy! Maybe he's a Captain in the glorious Crunch Island Navy!
Thanks for covering the hard-hitting news stories, CNN.
The last sentence finally made me laugh at an otherwise silly in a not-good way article
It's no mystery to me... obviously the poor commander is the one being ordered to eat that crap...
hold the phone.... who said cap n crunch was in the is navy - is crunch island a us territory? Maybe they have a different system on crunch island and the insignias are valid. did anyone think of that?
I believe in the Captain!. I grew up on him. But it reminds me of the 1st time i saw Capt Kangeroo on Color TV when i was 18 in 1975....and in the Air Force. Mr. Greenjeans was called that beccause he wore Green Jeans. Duh! who'da thunk it....
I believe in the Captain!. I grew up on him. But it reminds me of the 1st time i saw Capt Kangeroo on Color TV when i was 18 in 1975....and in the Air Force. Mr. Greenjeans was called that beccause he work Green Jeans. Duh! who'da thunk it....
I just checked "Captain" Kangaroo's jacket. Another imposter!! Stop the insanity! My whole childhood was one big lie!
Cap'n Crunch was busted for conduct unbecoming of an officer for what Count Chocula saw him doing when he paid for Trix with Fruity Pebbles, while going cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs. He also was accused of trying to get the Leprechaun's Lucky Charms, but to keep it quiet, he used his Chex to make that allegation go away.
Well done!!
Tasted more like Captain Crud to me. ("I'm coo coo for Cocoa Puffs!!)
The Captain says we can't get away with the crunch, and now he can't get away with the commander's bars.
Are we sure he's not actually a pirate in disguise?
This is a silly story and I hesitate to call it news, and the bloggers and twitter feeds are of no value, but it's cute to see the Navy get in on the fun. I smiled.
"captain" is not just a rank, it is the term given to whoever is in command of the "ship". Majority of US Navy vessels, such as "small boy" frigates, cruisers, destroyers all have commanders as their "captains". You won't find true captain ranked personnel until you get to the L decks or carriers.
Case in point, when I was stationed aboard submarines, all of my commanding officers were Commanders save one. And we called all of them Captain.
But somehow the GOP will say that it's a "scandal" because Obama might have, possibly, almost certainly, knew someone that may have know about this.
Just advertising posing as news. CNN is paying reporters so little now, they don't know the difference.
I care less about those name Who care?
I spent 6 years in the US Navy, 4.5 of which were on a Frigate. The Frigates are small, so the "Captain" of the ship was actually a Commander, not a full Captian. We called him Captain, not Commander.
One of the more famous examples was William Bligh. He was officially a Lieutenant-Commander in the Royal Navy when he was appointed "Captain" of the HMS Bounty. This was because he held "command" as a Lieutenant. Therefore Horatio Magellan Crunch can be referred to as Captain as long as he maintains command of the Good Ship Guppy.
What a completely stupid story and waste of resources by CNN! What happened to being a "news organization"? CNN today is only working for "eyeballs and clicks", this is where the money is (sadly)!
Capn Crunch wouldn't still be missing if they had just listened to Alex P Keaton and checked under that bus in Cleveland.
“Cap'n” Crunch instead of ”Captain.” Just another anomaly. Whats with the Crunch Berry Beast ? Must be more of Bill Scotts Idea.
There is something seriously wrong with his record if he's been in the navy for 50 years and has not advanced in rank that entire time. NCIS definitely needs to investigate - it's not even possible to be on active duty for 50 years! Plus no record of his being commissioned? At lest, he should retire, at best give the man a fourth stripe, at worst throw him in the brig for being a fraud and an imposter. And by all means, if nothing else, send him to a barber to get those eyebrows taken care of.
A good cartoon character artist shortens & exaggerates things by drawing impressions which are notoriously inaccurate. Notice HOW MANY FINGERS Does the Captain have? Only three, so see my point! So it doesn’t matter how many strips the captain is drawn with, it’s only an impression. Just because the captain has only three fingers, doesn’t mean that he has no hands. Once a captain always a captain, right Seadog? This ‘cartoon character’ was created for children.
How would _you_ like your fourth stripe being removed, not to mention two fingers from each hand?!
Just call me Pegleg
Pressure from Washington
PepsiCo. and other food companies are under pressure from the White House — especially from First Lady Michelle Obama — to make their products healthier. Activists have long been irate over the marketing of sweetened cereals such as Cap’n Crunch to children. Last year, PepsiCo vowed to reduce added sugar per serving by 25% and saturated fat by 15% in its products over the next 10 years. This pressure may explain why the Cap’n is less visible than he was in years past. A company spokesperson did not respond to a request for comment.
Heheheheh, bring back the Sugar!
I think we need to investigate Colonel Sanders next.
Don't get the animal rights groups fired up!
Colonel Sanders was never even in the military. Chew on that for a while.
It is customary in the navy to call the highest ranking officer of a navy vessel the "Captain of the ship." So he is Capt. Crunch if we can find his ship.
In the immortal words of Commodore James Norrinton to Captain Jack Sparrow (with emphasis on the word 'captain'), "I don't see your ship, Captain." Sparrow: "I'm in the market, as it were." 🙂
Neetzan Zimmerman of Gawker and Mary Beth Quirk of Consumerist need to get a life. Same with CNN for reporting this.
Actually, any naval officer that is in command of a vessel is addressed as captain, so even a commander can be a captain.
There is a simple explanation for this - he received a wartime promotion from Admiral Amalgam of the 6th Cavity Fleet in the heat of battle with more nutritious breakfasts. He and his crew won, of course, but the records were lost in an ocean of sugar water...
The commanding officer of a ship is called "captain" regardless of their rank. This is true for all US Navy and Coast Guard ships. In the US Coast Guard, it is not uncommon for a Lieutenant O-3 to have command of a ship. It is also not uncommon to have a commander 0-5 as captain of a naval vessel.
WTH? Slow news day?
Tune in tomorrow when CNN trashes Captain Kangaroo.
Actually, there are plenty of CDRs in the Navy called "Captain". O-5s (CDRs) that are commanding officers are still called "Captain". So maybe he was the Captain of a ship!!
Any word on what happened to his pinkies?
Actually, a US Navy captain's sleeve insignia was three stripes to at least March 1869. In May it was changed to four stripes. I don't think that goofy hat was part a modern navy uniform!
He had to be an officer .….… no one would buy a cereal named seaman crunch.
I remember when he was an ensign on my first boat.
"seaman crunch" – just brilliant.
Jesus Christ, people. It's a cartoon. The bloggers who picked it out are jokes, CNN is a joke for writing the story, those who are writing serious details responses are jokes, the Navy is a joke for answering it....good grief is this the height of mankind's intellectual curiosity that we all banter and debate a cartoon character? What's next...Bugs Bunny hasn't got the right number of whiskers? Holy s**t. Where's the Tylenol?
I'ts really interesting how nobody has anything better to do than pick apart Breakfast Cereal cartoons.. Read a Book or go for a walk... Nobody's worried about bringing our jobs home so we can go back to work and be productive... UNITED STATES OF AMERICA – BORN JULY 4th 1776 – DIED JAN 20th 2009
....and yet here you are.
Dude, lighten up, it's okay, really it is, to have a bit of fun with something like this. I'm delighted that even the Navy joined in to the fun.
During the Civil War Federal those holding the rank Captain (same as Army Colonel) to May 1863 wore THREE Stripes!
even if he's only a Commander, he could be addressed as Captain if he's in command of a ship.
I ate so much Cap'n Crunch when I was a boy that the roof of my mouth was continually bleeding, lol.
And I guess Count Chocula really isn't a Count then?
{sigh}
No reason to live anymore.
Commander Crunch sounds way better anyway!
"Commander Crunch" just doesn't have the same ring to it. A sad day indeed.
Crunch Island does not use the same insignia as the U.S. Navy.
The bigger scandal is Captain Kangaroo.
IN FACT that is a Drawing on a Cereal Box
This is just another sad scandal in the cereal world.
Last week, Toucan Sam confessed he that is just a raven with a nose job.
my marriage was a sham
what the %#! is this?
Any naval office commanding a ship or vessel is called Captain. Nothing better to have a fit over? Really???
Only landlubbing wogs should worry themselves so
Quaker should just promote him from Commander and be done with it. And yeah, a Commander in command of a vessel is referred to as 'Captain'.
They are also saying now that Jesus wasn't real.
A commander can be captain of a ship and then he would be called a captain. A commander can be captain of a destroyer
As a U.S. Navy Vet (1969 – 1973) I was stationed on the Arnold J. Isbell (DD869) and our first Captain (1970) was a Commander (3 Sleeve Stripes) like Cap'n Crunch – as long as he held he position of sitting captain on an active duty ship, he is officially a "Captain" and is addressed as such (by both enlisted and officers alike). Once relieved or transferred from command, the officer reverts to his official rank as "Commander".
CNN there is nothing to see here... move along...
had he worn the proper uniform he would have been charged with impersonating an Officer..
Those three gold bars designate the rank of Captain in the Crunch Berry navy.
That's just a early photo of him. I heard he made Admiral.
Give it a rest CNN...enough with the obesity issues and trying to bully people by saying...ok...if we can't make you understand eating junk cereal is bad for you and bad for Obamacare....we will just tell you that the Captain wasn't really a Captain...maybe now you will stop eating junk.
So then Jesse is not really a Captain either?
his high coat collar and hat worn athwart ship indicates he is a Napoleanic era captain. in this case the 2 shoulder boards indicates he is a captain. Commanders of that era only wore one shoulder board and commanded brigs or smaller. Is his vessel rigged ship wise with 3 masts square rigged? then he is a captain indeed
I am a 10 year Navy vet and my first command, which was a Navy warship, did in fact have a Navy COMMANDER as its captain. So, that being said, a Navy COMMANDER can still be a Captain.
Oh give it a rest. I'm still going to eat this cereal. Even it it's officially PROVEN that he isn't a captain I will still eat it because I like the taste.
I like the taste of Cap'n Crunch, but I *HATE* what it does to the roof of my mouth! I much prefer Peanut Butter Crunch for this reason. And Reese's cereal is simply the BEST! commenting on his eyebrows is one thing, but look at his eyes! They're in front of his hat! Aren't they awfully dried out by now, stuck out like that? Or maybe he had them replaced with artificial eyes... like those on dolls and such? Hmm...
He looks like a cartoon captain to me so his eyes probably don't dry out because they aren't made of real human eye material.
You're wrong!
No you're wrong!
Ad infinitum.
the Cap'n is in his rights... as i remember i got a boat with my cereal some 40 years ago in which he was purportedly in command thereof. Going back hundreds of years in both British Royal and US Navies any officer of any rank who commanded a vessel was referred to as CAPTAIN while associated as the commander of that vessel. Clearly he appears to be an office of the BLUE....
If the commanding officer of a vessel is not a Captain he traditionally is referred to as "skipper". Captain crunch is a charlatan and his cereal cuts up your gums like you're eating glass!!
I salute you brother, I was on DD687 in the 60s. Interesting times they were.
The original crew is not navy ! Alfie, Brunhilde, Carlyle and Dave, as well as the canine Sea Dog, who sailed with the Cap'n on his ship
Its those background checks!
CNN, what happened to you? Poop cruises? Embracing the lunatic fringe political parties? That morning show producer just doesn't get it, does he? This is not news. NSA is news, but not the whistleblower. Bank of America whitleblowers are news; that's the newsiest news right now. Do your job. You were once a public trust.
Anything to keep from telling you the truth about what the Obama Whitehouse is doing.
O'BAMA !!
you realize this is an internet site, where EVERYTHING is reported including humor.
Calm down racist old man
GET A SENSE OF HUMOR!!!!
Can you say "stick in the mud?"
CNN is a very sad news source.
It's not news. It's "infotainment".
its spelled 'Irritatainment'